Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows