So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
