We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
