Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
