Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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