Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Randomize
