now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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