So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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