i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.