Where are you?
In a non slutty way
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
