okay pat passed out under dana's car
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.