Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Is her dick bigger than yours?
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Randomize
