Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
