She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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