i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
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