i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Randomize
