so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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