he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Randomize
