yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
