I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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