Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
