ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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