dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize