allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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