it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
