I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
