sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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