8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I have already put on my inside pants.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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