I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
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