But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
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