Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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