You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
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