i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
my shit smells like andre
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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