guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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