I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
