Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Duck Duck Cougar?
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize