what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
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