Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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