It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
