just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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