I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Randomize
