Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
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