is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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