you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
Randomize
