Texts From Last Night

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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight

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  (203): I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight http://tfl.nu/ncr8
  Replies (79) Good night (7709) Bad night (610)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story

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  (734): she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story http://tfl.nu/o2hn
  Replies (12) Good night (6272) Bad night (721)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...

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  (416): he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun... http://tfl.nu/vbhp
  Replies (10) Good night (5446) Bad night (1051)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.

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  (602): You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary. http://tfl.nu/hnqx
  Replies (24) Good night (5413) Bad night (1046)
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  (516): View more from New York

  i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".

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  (516): i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed". http://tfl.nu/0nax
  Replies (40) Good night (1094) Bad night (5277)
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  (251): View more from Alabama

  Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.

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  (251): Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game. http://tfl.nu/jamc
  Replies (18) Good night (4970) Bad night (940)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party

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  (801): We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party http://tfl.nu/w1ty
  Replies (8) Good night (3198) Bad night (725)
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  (212): View more from New York

  It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis

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  (212): It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis http://tfl.nu/3xfb
  Replies (13) Good night (2533) Bad night (1228)
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener

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  (647): she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener http://tfl.nu/wmbx
  Replies (22) Good night (4033) Bad night (1902)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow

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  (206): I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow http://tfl.nu/8ygv
  Replies (27) Good night (2406) Bad night (972)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?

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  (780): So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends? http://tfl.nu/kqn5
  Replies (5) Good night (2992) Bad night (640)
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  (310): View more from California

  Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again

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  (310): Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again http://tfl.nu/9kfj
  Replies (7) Good night (398) Bad night (1250)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.

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  (920): She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls. http://tfl.nu/7oj4
  Replies (2) Good night (665) Bad night (339)
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"

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  (318): A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?" http://tfl.nu/oinl
  Replies (5) Good night (1621) Bad night (375)
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  (212): View more from New York

  Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight

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  (212): Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight http://tfl.nu/x45a
  Replies (1) Good night (483) Bad night (339)

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