Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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