is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I am one with the molecules