i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
