you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Who died my cat blue again?
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
