She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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