I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
