i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
