that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
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We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
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